what did you first see?

Did you see the stars in my eyes, when you took me away,
from this place I call home. This place I call hell.
And we drive ourselves under the ground,
misplacing our hearts and our minds.
Leaving it all behind, because we only need eachother.
We don't need air, we don't need light.
Nourishment from one another keeps us alive.

Something inside me wants you to love me.
Something beneath my skin tells me to kill you.
Inside this skull lies thoughts I can't share,
thoughts of kissing your lips so lightly,
but just as soon as I lay my hands upon your face,
I smash you into a brick wall. Scratching at your eyes. Hitting you, beating you, tearing off your clothes. Turning down the lights and closing the blinds as I strip your mind, body, soul, and skin.

Swimming in sheets so thick, swimming in your disease.
Drowning in your memories, drowning in your bloodstreams.
Struggling to take your lifeless body,
and push it over the cliff.
To say goodbye is like saying hello, except this time it's so much harder. Hard to not jump into your arms and scream, and ask you why you hate me.
why do you hate me? why do you do this to me?
why me? There is nothing left to break,
There is nothing left to brusie.
I am scars, and wounds. I am made of lies and deception.
I've learned to accept no one.
I've learned to hate it all.

I didn't teach myself these things,
It's you that gave me this flaw.